Yes, unfortunately some of them are like this. But if you don't at least give it a cursory glance you may miss out on some awesome sauce. Tip your toe in, you don't have to go all in on every relationship possibility that comes along. It pays to be somewhat reserved and discriminating in your choices.
Imagine what a beautiful relationship it would be if neither held the other responsible for their happiness.... This is my dream relationship. Love and freedom. Freedom to love, freedom to fuck up and freedom to grow from it - all without hurting each other in the process, because both understand the continuing transformative cycle of life, death, and growth. <3