The choices you make regarding divorce will affect your children for years and, yes, decades to come. For their sake, try to take the high road and be the role model they will come to respect and later want to emulate. Here are some helpful tips for mindfully supporting the children you love before, during, and long after your divorce.
In New Jersey, the person who has physical custody has actual possession of the child. Having legal custody means both parents have the right to make decisions for the child in the areas of health and education. After the parents live separately, the physical and legal custody arrangements must be settled with a custody decision either amongst themselves, memorialized by the court in the final judgment of divorce, or by a family law judge if the parents cannot agree.
The term "irreconcilable differences" is used in divorce proceedings to denote that the spouses cannot find any reasons to continue living together. In California Family Law, grounds for divorce are substantial reasons for not continuing the marriage and which make it appear that the marriage should be dissolved. Other states such as New York and Massachusetts use "irretrievable breakdown of the marriage" to refer to the same notion.
When considering the consequences of divorce, effects on children are perhaps the most impactful and far-reaching. The big question often explored more in hindsight than at the moment is whether staying together is better at all costs. Children are the innocent victims—the bystanders who get swept into the aftermath of a decision they had no say in. Divorce is never easy. And, while some children rebound on the merits of inherent resilience, others struggle greatly, even into adulthood.
There are 4 types of divorce, that is 4 methods or ways to divorce. Which one's right for you is something you and your Ex-in-waiting will have to weigh carefully. Several factors will influence the type of divorce you choose. The process of divorce can be as amicable or contentious as you make it. How long the divorce process will take.
Parental alienation syndrome may sound clinical and technical, but it refers to an all too common occurrence during and after divorce. Children who have been trained to not like one of their parents are often seen in custody disputes. Such training, programming, or what some might call "brainwashing" can be labeled as parental alienation when its goal is to strengthen the role of the abusing parent.
1 in 10 Americans have used drugs within the last thirty days - a court will most definitely take notice. Each parent may jockey for position in trying to gain an advantage with custody and visitation. In some situations, one may accuse the other of drug use – regardless of the truth. An overview on drug use and testing in divorce cases may be useful.
There are divorce mistakes women make that can lead to greater loss than marriage alone. Decisions have to be made, and many of those decisions will be complicated and tempt your emotional resolve. Mistakes women make are born out of this conflict and can be costly and regretful after there is clarity and it's too late to make changes.
After divorce, family routines are disrupted and then pieced back together. Your energy levels are low to nonexistent. While kids bounce back quicker, on some level, they may be sharing some of these feelings too. Coparenting skills are similar if not the same as those you were practicing before your divorce. Here are eight of the best coparenting skills we wish to share. Keep these in mind as you navigate your divorce and post-divorce journey with your children’s other parent.
Getting a divorce and co-parenting might sound like a challenge, but the children should be your top priority. If your heart is in the right place, you'll find it's a challenge you're up for. Even after the divorce, you will have to keep seeing your Ex if you decide on joint custody. To read on and find out why badmouthing your co-parent isn't a good idea just stop over at SAS For Women.
It's difficult to know what to do when your child acts like your ex. For one client, every "gotcha" from her kid seemed like a razor's edge. "Gotcha" was her ex's "pretending" to listen. Your ex's looks are on your kids' faces! Her words may have been coined by your ex. When your son grimaces, you remember your husband's sneers and dismissal of you.
Coparenting with a narcissist means that you have to be the calm, reasonable, and affectionate parent. Narcissism prevents your Ex from being an empathetic and nurturing parent. Your Ex's focus is on his own experience and not your children's. You have some space to breathe and think without the persistent and all-consuming fear of how he will react.
Being a parent always offers a healthy dose of challenges, but parenting through divorce means facing challenges on a whole other level. Throughout your divorce, you may feel a surge of emotions—from anger to bitterness—but it’s ever so important to cope with them. Despite the impulses you may feel, these are some things you should not do to lessen the impact of divorce on you and your children.
Determining child custody can be the most challenging aspect of the divorce process. Gathering key legal advice about custody can help you prepare for the challenges ahead. The more information you have, the easier it will be to plan for your children's emotional well-being. There are two types of legal custody in New York State: sole custody or joint legal custody. Some issues that may define parental custody include your children's special needs, learning differences, their wishes.
Exploring whether you should divorce your husband or stay for the kids. What was supposed to be happily ever after has become an ordeal you cannot escape. Divorce is never easy – on anyone involved. But, it isn't always bad either. Your job as a mom is making the best decision you can; working hard to limit the fallout; and helping your kids persevere through it all. To learn more about making the decision to divorce be sure to read the full post.
Like many divorcing women, you may need to reinvent your career in this next phase of your life. With that change comes new possibilities for you in the gig economy. Side hustles offer opportunities to earn an income that won't take you away from your children for long hours. Some of these gigs are fun and align nicely with your family's needs. You often control your schedule, meet new people, and sometime the money is quite good.
Discover what a custody battle and how do you avoid one? This is a common cause of litigation in family court, second only to litigation over support payments. Custody battles are costly, both emotionally and financially, and can wreak havoc in the lives of the children involved. It’s important to educate yourself about the common causes of custody battles, how to avoid one, how to defend your child’s best interests, and what to do if you must file one.
The quality of the relationships among family members has a significant impact on whether or not these long-term effects of divorce on children is damaging. When you focus on creating and maintaining a low conflict environment, kids stand the best chance of growing into healthy adults. The "Bill of Rights for Children Whose Parents are Separated or Divorced" was created through the work of Jill Greenstein. To read the full post on helping children cope with divorce go to SAS Women and
Whether you're divorced or not, if your children know that their parents are there for them, then that is all it takes to make a family. This is the time in your children’s lives when they need your support, patience, and understanding the most. Parents are not the only ones who go through a divorce, and the experience can be very confusing for children of all ages.
When a husband claims equal time with his children after years of being absent, is it possible to overcome the presumption that the children will suffer? The law is on the father's side because of the presumption of equal parenting rights. In order to overcome this presumption, you will need to have admissible evidence showing it will not be in the childrens' best interests. Read full post to find out more.
“I had to begin to create the woman I wanted to meet five years from today. Here is how I began that journey, and how I came to accept an invitation that took my breath away”. “With shaking knees and a thud in my chest, I did it. I rsvp'd YES. (I wonder, would you?). I knew on some level, I'd been playing around too long.
Here are some tips to get you started, whether you're considering divorce or are already in it. There really is no one way to be married or divorce. The easiest method for smart women to get through the divorce process is to look at it as a whole, then narrow it down and divide it down into manageable pieces. Slow down and make sure you're going in the right way. Like any journey, you must first learn the lay of the land and gain a holistic awareness of the new region you are entering.
Dating after divorce can make you pine for your early days of romance. What was once a natural, easy "finding yourself in love" is now all grown up with history, baggage, and responsibility. Sometimes it would seem easier to write a scarlet "D" on your forehead and have your relationship interview answers printed on a T-shirt.
How do you inform your kids you're divorced? Putting off telling them because you're not sure what to say or how? You're not alone. Every mother will tell you that the thought of hurting your child is terrifying. It'd be difficult to tell your kids you'd divorce... With a few standards in place, it can be far less stressful and perhaps lead to better continuous communication with your kids.